HANDLING CHANGE IN MARRIAGE.

Benita chatted nervously with her peers. They were to write the first of their final exams. 4 years in the University as a student of Guidance and Counselling was finally coming to an end. 

“Settle down” said Dr Pwajok who was the lecturer of the course. “You are to study this case and give the counsel you find most appropriate. You have 30 minutes, good luck”.

There was no time to waste. After a brief prayer, she opened her booklet and focused on the study which was titled “Mr and Mrs Solomon’s change in marriage”.

 “I met Deji during our final year in the University. We just connected and we had a wonderful relationship that was known to all our classmates and family members. Immediately after our service year I got a job as a teacher in a school while he was an accountant in a firm.

We got married and life was really sweet for the first 7 years. We had three kids and things began to fall apart. All our three kids were very sick and they were convulsing. We spent a fortune in different hospitals and I had to quit my job to tend to them but my husband couldn’t because that would spell doom on our finances. 

He was transferred out of Lagos. The kids were out of the hospital but they still had fits. This continued for three years and it was embarrassing for us all and depressing for the kids. We tried different hospitals but it was all to no avail as the doctors couldn’t diagnose what was wrong.

It was one of their teachers that invited me to her Church. I met the Pastor who told me to fast 21 days and come for prayers. He said that it was an attack on them and I had to be careful. After the fasting and prayers, I noticed the convulsion reduced drastically till it disappeared.

Since I’m not stupid, I continued attending the Church. The Church had its own rigid principles like not wearing earrings or trousers or anything flashy. I knew Deji might raise an eyebrow but I wasn’t ready to lose any of my children and he was supposed to understand that.

When Deji informed me that he had been transferred back to Lagos I was glad we would be back as a family but it wasn’t so. He didn’t like my dressing and I explained the purpose and he didn’t understand. 

One day, he woke me up and told me he couldn’t continue in that manner. He told me to choose between him and the Church. I was shocked but I knew I had to pick the Church. This made him send me packing. In 2 months, he brought in another woman and she had a set of twins in a little over 5 months.

Isn’t this the height of betrayal?”

Read the concluding part HERE.

Photo credit: blackandmarriedwithkids.com